Insomnia

Last night I had some trouble sleeping, and made some fun discoveries on the internet. (Sigh... I'm so happy I was born this century. The internet is such a wonderful way to waste time!)

The Standardized Should I Stalk William Shatner Test
http://www.apeculture.com/games/shatner.htm

Discovery Kids Crossword Puzzle Generator
http://puzzlemaker.school.discovery.com/

So You've Hired a Hippie
http://rumandmonkey.com/articles/305/

AMPM Coffee... You'd better visit this one for yourself...
http://ampm.com/coffee/decisions.php

It Never Turns Out The Way You Expect

I always have the ridiculous fantasy of Christmas being "just like the ones I used to know". The smell of baking cookies... snow softly falling... wrapping those last few presents... the family all together and cheerful... My Christmas has never turned out that way, and yet I still expect it every year. Has anyone's Christmas EVER been that way? I don't think so. I'm always hoping- no, honestly believing- I will have a Martha Stewart Christmas ...and I always get a "National Lampoon Christmas Vacation".

This year brought a jaunt with a tow-truck and a rum bottle. Ok, and a few real Christmas miracles. (I lost track of a few debit-card purchases & knew my account was low... when I deposited my checks today, I was only 20 cents away from an overdraft! If that isn't a miracle, I don't know what is!)

Cheers to the holidays.

One More Sleep Til...Alpena?

You're not going to believe it... but this is post #2 today! (I'm on a roll!) Well, for one thing, I don't have anything to do anymore. I finished reading the Bible the other day. It took so long, I'm not sure what to do with all this free time. ...Now to all of those rolling around on the floor laughing (you know who you are!), yes, I did start reading it because I felt like a schmuck. I've read so many other scriptures from other religions that I felt like a hypocrite for not reading my own. I started out of a sense of duty, but somewhere along the way I found some things I was looking for. I'm all enlightened and filled with Zen and Christmas spirit.

Almost as exciting- today I discovered that Quizno's has new breadbowls! Oh, they're heavenly. Karen did not share my enthusiasm. But she'll come around. ;)

Finally, tomorrow is my last day at work before the holiday.
Friday I see my Jme and get the grand tour of Alpena.
Saturday I sit around drinking wine and scarfing down Christmas cookies while watching "A Bing Crosby Christmas Special".
Sunday I open my presents and drive to Ohio to see the grandparents, aunts, uncles,etc.
Monday I wonder why in the hell I drove to Ohio to see the grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. and drive back. Then on Tuesday it's back to work. Doesn't sound very relaxing, does it? Hmmm. I wish I could go back to being 8.
My schedule then was:
Thursday, sledding and hot chocolate. Brother tells me that if I drink hot chocolate right after coming inside, my teeth will crack.
Friday, sledding and no hot chocolate.
Saturday, sledding and hot chocolate while watching "Rudolph" (after Mom convinces me that brother was kidding.)
Sunday, presents- Barbies and Pound Purries if I'm lucky, drive to Ohio to see family.
Monday, wonder why I left my Barbies and Pound Purries to get cruddy presents from extended family.

Gotta love the holidays.

21 Things I Want In A Lover

On exactly the same day, two people insisted that I write this list down. The first was Jme, as a blog-challenge, and lord knows I can't say no to her. The second was my mom, who firmly believes that I'm going to be an "old maid" with forty cats and when I die, I'll be discovered by the mailman when he notices the smell...

Fine, fine. I can take a hint. So, in the spirit of Alanis, "these are 21 things that I want in a lover, not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer"

1. Are you brave enough to look like a fool?
2. Can you laugh at yourself?
3. Do you agree that happiness is worth more than money?
4. Do you dream big?
5. Are you quirky? Will you make me feel normal?
6. Did you refuse to "grow up"?
7. Do you like kids?
8. Will you have wrapping paper-tube swordfights?
9. Do you find that you have the most thought-provoking conversations at 3:00am?
10. Can you tell me what I'm thinking before I say it?
11. Do you believe in leaping before you look?
12. Are you a man of faith?
13. Do you believe that family should come first?
14. Do you think you can handle mine?
15. Can you see beauty in everyday things?
16. Will you keep the romance alive?
17. Can you be mainstream and still maintain traditional values?
18. Will you pretend to be interested in my pointless/boring stories?
19. Will you make me laugh like no one else?
20. I have a very stupid cat. Can you treat her with civility?
21. I'm dancing to "The Chicken Dance" (and possibly even the "Macarena") at my wedding. Will you be joining me on the dance floor?

Aleisha's Top Ten

I never know what to write in this thing. I tend to feel like if I don't have something profound to say (or at least "mildly amusing"), I shouldn't write an entry. Are any of the other blogs here profound or amusing? Not so much. So in honor of not having anything decent to say:

Topics That Didn't Quite Cut It

• It's time to buy a new desktop daily calendar. For the last 3 years, I've had the 3 LOTR movie calendars, but now that they're all done, I don't know what kind to buy...
• I've had very weird dreams all week long, each one centered on finding an ancient sacred book...
• Why is it that no matter how much I buy or how often I shop, there always seems to be one more gift that I still need before Christmas...
• I need a haircut. Bad.
• I spent the last three days retouching over two hundred portraits of couples from a company Christmas party. Every stinkin' woman had glitter spray in her hair, which looks like dandruff in the pictures...
• I really don't like Dean Cain. He gives me the creeps.
• What is it about being 13 years old that makes a person inherently annoying beyond all reason? Why do they travel in packs?
• My county has switched from using sand on the snowy roads to using salt. Wow. It really makes a huge difference.
• I'm really pissed about the postage increase. I hate that I have to pay to send my bills. Now I have to pay more.
• Tropicana Twister Twisted Black Cherry Lemonade is about the coolest thing I've ever found in a gas station. Mmmm. You gotta try it.

Once There Were Four Children...

Well, I went to see "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe" tonight. Let me start by saying that I really did enjoy it. It was a good movie. Very magical. It had a good pace, cute kids playing the Pevensies, and some fun cameo voice appearances. The opening scene is particularly well-done and surprisingly heart-wrenching. The stage is set even more effectively than in the book.

But... I went in the theater with very high expectations. My complaints are pretty silly, actually.

For one thing, the computer-animation wasn't always as good as I expected it to be. It was too obvious- I was too conscious of it while watching- like a splinter. Coming from the same people who created Gollum of the LOTR franchise, I had hoped to see a more realistic-looking lion. The wolves looked great... why did Aslan look like Mufasa? Which brings me to my second complaint (which really isn't a complaint at all!). Every time Aslan opened his mouth, I was genuinely surprised and moderately disappointed to hear Liam Neeson (who is super!) instead of James Earl Jones. No one can do talking lions like Darth Vader.

Ha, I shouldn't be whining at all. When I was a kid, I loved the made-for-tv version that aired on PBS - I still have it on video. At least there are no people in giant beaver costumes this time around.

I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas...

It's only December 10, and I'm already on Christmas movie overload. I suppose that is to be expected with a three year old in the family, but seriously, if I see The Grinch one more time....

Anyway, I was sick of the usual Christmas specials, but still wanted to see something "Christmasy"... so I went back to the classics and rented "Holiday Inn". Ugh. I'm so in love with Bing Crosby it's just plain sickening. Awwh, I love it when he goes and finds Linda in Hollywood and they sing together... They don't make 'em like that anymore, that's for sure.

I followed up with "Going My Way" after that and "Shop Around the Corner" (I really hate "It's A Wonderful Life", but thought I'd give Jimmy Stewart another try... no such luck.) When it comes down to it, this generation can keep Mr. Brad Pitt (schmuck... Oops?! Did I say that out loud?) I'd rather dance with Fred Astaire, be romanced by Cary Grant, and of course, be serenaded by my Bing than waste precious hours of my life on something as ridiculous as "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".

Bathing Beauty

Waaaay back in college, in place of a regular textbook, I was required to subscribe to a very prestigious (and expensive!) graphic design magazine called "Graphis". Even with my student discount, it was $90-some dollars for six issues. Now at some point, this magazine sold my name to lots of companies who sell expensive graphic design-related products. I'm always getting something from Pantone, or an invitation to a seminar in NYC, that kind of thing.

Anyway, today I found a BIG ol' package in my mail. I opened it right up (a little worried that I had accidentally ordered something online) and it turns out to be paper samples. It was all part of a very expensive ad campaign. Then I noticed some bright flowers in the bottom of the package. I thought to myself, "Cool, a lei!", reached in and pulled out.... a bathing cap?

I don't "get it", but I'm having SO much fun with this thing! In fact, I've been enjoying it so much, that I modeled it for everybody. (Somehow, I look a little like a drag queen in it, don't I?)










Call it "performance art". Trust me, you'll be seeing a lot more of me in my bathing cap!!!! HA!

Grown-Up Christmas List

I'm feeling very ...spirited today. It's lightly snowing outside, just enough to be pretty instead of annoying. (Dusting my car off after work is one thing and digging it out is another!) Jewel is serenading me in the background (it's currently "Ave Maria"). I'm in the middle of our first and only lull of the day (today is the first day of our Children's Christmas Special). Ahhh, for a few minutes, life is quiet and good.

It is the time of year to count our blessings and to share them with those who are less fortunate. The need is great, and our response to it should be equally great. I know that a lot of charities will be asking for help this time of year, and that the extra money we have will only go so far. So, in the spirit of giving (for those of us on a tight budget!) I'd like to encourage everyone to join a campaign that is looking for voices, not money. It is the ONE campaign (http://www.one.org/). There you can "sign" the ONE big noise letter, encouraging President Bush to fight for AIDS relief and fair trade agreements at the upcoming G8 Summit in Hong Kong. This campaign is cross-political- it's really about helping people, not furthering any agenda. Please visit their website to learn more.

Turkey Shenanigans

I'm neglecting my blog again.

Here's the recap:

The Tuesday before break, my boss decided to chastise me. We were doing an early Christmas session for one of his friend's children, and apparently while preparing the set, I leaned over and part of my lower back was showed (gasp!). This lady was livid that her small girls had to see something so offensive. Grrr. I share my office space with a dog, a Harley, and whatever else happens to be sitting around... and in the company of all that, I'M offensive.

Luckily, Karen was in town that day and we went to see the latest Harry Potter installment to take my mind off it. AND it was BYOB (bring your own bucket!) Tuesday. So we gorged ourselves on popcorn and candy.

Ha. Well, we put a picture from that session on the front of our Christmas mailer. Today, one of our best clients praised the mailer (which I designed) and then asked why we used "such homely children". :) I've been grinning all day long.

Well, Thanksgiving went pretty well. I spent the day being completely useless (except for yanking the turkey guts out- that's my one t-day responsibility!). I also watched "Top Hat". Love that movie. I tapped danced everywhere I went for the rest of the day.

Oh, and we had a crazy blizzard. On Wednesday, there was practically no snow on the ground. By Thursday evening, it was up to my waist.

Then it all melted again...

Well, anyway, I've been busily buying the tightest, sexist things I can find that technically speaking don't violate my new dress code. It's war!!!

Is There A Time For "Miss Sarajevo"?

Ugh. Shot right through the heart. I bought the Vertigo tour DVD today... didn't look at the playlist on back...watched it...finished it...mostly it was great...BUT there is no "Miss Sarajevo"! I'm sitting there in disbelief as the credits are rolling, thinking, "No, this can't possibly be the end." HOW COULD THEY NOT PLAY MISS SARAJEVO!!!!??? (Ok, it was more of a "Hell no! They played "Running to Stand Still" instead??!!") It was such a focal point in the Detroit show... I was so looking forward to having it on this DVD. Never expected U2 to let me down... Sigh

I watched "Dead Poets Society" right after the Vertigo DVD. To be honest, I don't care for Robin Williams. Something about him makes me feel all crawly and barfey. Don't get me wrong, it's a great movie, very inspirational, -but- while watching, I began to consider how much young Robin Williams and Bono (minus shades) look alike- they have a very similar bone structure. That just creeped me out.

Moving along.

Thanksgiving is coming! Yea for a short work week! (Still picturing Bono as Robin Williams)

Rockin' Around the Xmas Tree

Forget everything I said before about not feeling any Christmas spirit. Today we had our first real snowfall. (Did I say snowfall? I meant BLIZZARD!) And I couldn't help myself. I went Christmas shopping after work, bought lots of decorations and trimmings, and then spent a good two hours wrapping presents.

HA! I'M BACK!

Tonight I'll have to load my Ipod up with Christmas-y songs. Then I'll have to design my Christmas card... There's just so much to do!

Am I So Unloveable?

Grrr. I had a really crappy day.

Around 3:00, I was sent downstairs to work quietly ( meaning "pretend I don't exist") for the duration of a meeting with an important client. The lighting downstairs absolutely sucks. You can see your reflection in the monitors better than what's on the screen, so I usually turn the lights off when I'm working there. My boss' wife keeps turning the lights back on the second I turn them off. The third time it happens, I start to say "Actually, I'd prefer to have the lights off- I can't see well..." But she starts to scream at me before I even finish. Apparently, the DOG might want to come downstairs and I HAVE to leave them on in case it does. (Because the dog's desire to float around the business is more important than my needing to work.)

I sat down and cried. No sobbing... no one heard or noticed, just a few quiet tears. I shouldn't have, the situation didn't deserve that kind of response, but I did it anyway. I was already feeling bad about myself, and hearing that the dog's needs outweigh mine was about the last thing I needed.

Over the last few days, I've come to realize how many of my friends were merely "friends of convenience" or "friends by association"... and how few actually liked me. I've been looking back at certain times of my life and feeling like so much of it was a lie. Ugh. And now even the damn dog is higher than me on the totem pole.

Where Are You Christmas?

I think I'm in a funk.

Normally I'm the ultimate Christmas elf, bubbling over with "Peace on Earth" and decking the halls by mid-October. But not this year. I'm stuck somewhere back in September, just after "back to school" and before Halloween. I've been out Christmas shopping, trying to "beat the rush" but even that isn't doing it for me. Am I depressed? I don't feel depressed. Am I losing the Christmas spirit? Will I still be able to hear the bell ring this year?

I have a disoriented feeling - like when you take a nap, wake up a few hours later and think it's the next morning. Except I missed a month or two in there somewhere. November is almost half-over and I'm feeling very unprepared. Thanksgiving can't possibly be so close.

Maybe I was abducted by aliens, and they adjusted my memory. That would explain the new bar-code tattoo on the back of my neck.

Better Days

It seems like every time I turn the radio on, I immediately turn it off again. I love dance/hip hop as much as the next person, but I'm sorry... "My Humps"? (Dammit, it's stuck in my head now!) What happened to songs that are ABOUT SOMETHING? What happened to "inspired lyrics"? I guess I don't "get" today's pop music. I'd totally given up on the radio and joined the ranks of ipoders.

Today, on my way to lunch I accidentally left my ipod at work. I hesitantly flicked the radio on and heard the Goo Goo Dolls latest single. Wow. It's a sort of generic Christmas prayer. It's beautiful, it's haunting, and most importantly, it's not about someone's ass.

Better Days

And you ask me what I want this year
And I try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days
Cuz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings
And desire and love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words
And sing out loud
Cuz everyone is forgiven now
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

And it's someplace simple where we could live
And something only you can give
And that's faith and trust and peace while we're alive
And the one poor child that saved this world
And there's 10 million more who probably could
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

So take these words
And sing out loud
Cuz everyone is forgiven now
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

I wish everyone was loved tonight
And somehow stop this fight
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words
And sing out loud
Cuz everyone is forgiven now
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

Thank you, Johnny. I needed this.

One Fish, Two Fish

Yesterday I decided to feng shui my bedroom. (That's how I found Mr. TV Remote!) Unfortunately, I don't have a clue how to do it, so I just moved stuff until I felt more "positive energy". (Actually, it was time to move everything around so that my carpet will wear more evenly, but feng shui sounds sexier.)

For some reason, I always have really weird dreams whenever I change something about my sleeping situation. So of course, last night was a doozie. I dreamed that I was in a spaceship, and we docked at an interstellar Meijer. There's characters from sci-fi movies all over the place... klingons, jedi, random Egyptian people... I decided that I wanted to turn one of the rooms in the spaceship into an aquarium, so I bought a bunch of space-fish. (Someone made a snide comment about the fact that I hadn't checked the labels properly, and that all of my fish would probably eat each other.) Anyway, I put my fish in the room, close the door, fill it all the way to the ceiling with water, and go somewhere else for a while. I go back to the room to show somebody my "aquarium" and the carpet has soaked all the water up and all my fish are dead.

Who knows. I don't even like aquariums. Must have feng shui-ed very badly.

I Think It's Time to Buy a Plot in the Graveyard

First of all, I'm pleased to announce that Mr. TV Remote Control was discovered earlier this afternoon. He was simply hiding under my bed, NOT kidnapped for ransom as we all suspected. Thank you to everyone who kept him in your thoughts and prayers these last few weeks!

Second, my gray hairs are multiplying like crazy. I was brushing my hair today, looked closely, and noticed that they're everywhere!!! It won't be long before I really have to start dying it. Sigh. I'm too young for this. Before you know it, I'll have fine lines and things will start to sag.

Finally, we just had our first winter weather advisory of the year. I swear, if I wake up to a white snow cover tomorrow...

100 Things About Me

Jme has an irritating ability to inspire me. Bleh.

Presenting "The 100 Things You Never Needed to Know About Me But Will Waste Your Time Reading Anyway"

1. I play the violin. Very poorly, granted. But I own one.
2. I quit taking lessons many years ago when my teacher suffered a stroke. Never found another teacher.
3. The first real concert I ever went to was Kathy Mattea. (eek!)
4. My first real rock concert was Third Eye Blind. They weren't very good.
5. My first album was Bette Midler's "Some People's Lives"- featuring the smash hit "From a Distance".
6. My first favorite artist, however, was James Taylor. (Mom and I sang Jellyman Kelly on the way to preschool!!!)
7. After Bette, I disowned pop and listened to nothing but classical music for about three years.
8. That would be from the age of 8-11.
9. My parents thought I was a weird kid.
10. They were right.
11. I wore a lot of sweatshirts with cats on them then too.
12. And the cutest boy in class called me "catwoman". I didn't mind. :)
13. I had a pair of "hammer pants" I liked to wear with my kitty shirts. (The fashions of the late 80s and early 90s still make me shudder!)
14. My mom still hates the way I dress.
15. But we wear the same shoe size, and she likes those well enough.
16. My feet have been the same size as my mom's since the fifth grade.
17. I was literally a foot shorter then. Eek!
18. I was also in safety patrol in fifth grade.
19. Shockingly, no one ever tried to beat me up in all of elementary school.
20. Ok, except one boy... but I won the fight, and he ended up with his head in a snowbank.
21. I did a lot of stupid things in the winter, like jump over the side of the hill I lived on when there was a good ice cover. Did I say hill? I meant... cliff.
22. Come to think of it, I leaped off the side of that cliff during the summer as well.
23. Sometimes I jumped over the side with a piece of cardboard to sit on. Sometimes I didn't.
24. Miraculously, I've never broken any bones.
25. Actually, I've never been admitted to a hospital.
26. And I haven't thrown-up since I was in 3rd grade.
27. I puked my guts out for a week, and decided I was never going to do that ever again. And I haven't.
28. When I'm feeling really nauseous, I tend to collapse or pass-out instead.
29. But I've only lost consciousness twice.
30. One of those times, I really clocked myself on the noggin.
31. Speaking of hitting my head, I slipped in the bathtub once, and cracked my head open on the toilet.
32. Incidentally, that was also in third grade. Rough year.
33. Bleeding on the bathroom floor, I dreamt up the flux-capacitor.
34. I slipped because I was dancing in the shower.
35. I have a big scar down the middle of my left eyebrow from that episode.
36. If the men in my family knew how to put the toilet seat down, it probably wouldn't have hurt quite so badly.
37. I was on vacation when it happened, in a hotel.
38. Later in the week, I took a dive on Stone Mountain (in GA?) and skinned my ankle up really bad.
39. I still have a scar from that too.
40. The worst part of all of it was that my parents wouldn't let me go in the hotel's pool with all my boo-boo's and I had to watch "The Wizard of Oz" while my brothers went swimming.
41. I've never liked that movie. The blue "Oh-eee-oh---yo-ooh" dudes freaked me out.
42. My least-favorite movies all seem to star Ben Stiller.
43. My favorite movies all seem to star Johnny Depp.
44. Or Alan Rickman. I dearly love that freaky man.
45. I love all men with British-derived accents (British, Welsh, Irish, Scottish, Australian, etc.). Who doesn't?
46. I tend to place a high importance on very stupid things when it comes to the opposite sex.
47. I will most likely die a crazy old maid, and my fifty cats will feast on my rotting corpse for a few weeks before anyone discovers me.
48. Or they will bring me back to life, and I will become Catwoman.
49. "Meow".
50. I not-so-secretly enjoy wearing leather. But where does one respectably wear leather pants?
51. (Good God, I'm still only on number 51?)
52. I dance like no one's watching...
53. I sing like no one's listening...
54. I drop things, fall over things, basically make a fool of myself many times a day... and always pretend that I meant to do whatever it was I did.
55. I really do like myself. I like that I'm a big dork. I like that I'm not a poised, sophisticated woman. I like that sometimes I spill ketchup on my pants. I'm human, and I'm 100% cool with that.
56. My mom says I remind her of Meg Ryan's characters in chick flicks. She says I'm a cute loser.
57. I think she meant that as a compliment? ... moving on...
58. "Unsolved Mysteries" scared the hell out of me on a weekly basis.
59. I still have an irrational fear of/nightmares about aliens and yeti.
60. I also have an irrational fear of the late Robert Stack.
61. I think I would feel more comfortable if David Duchovney were my personal bodyguard.
62. I remember at least some part of my dreams almost every night.
63. Cannibal pygmies show up a lot more often than you would think.
64. As do lightsaber duels.
65. One time I had a dream that the devil was chasing me and everywhere I went, he was already there. I woke up wondering if it was just a dream- or not.
66. Oddly, I've never had a fear of ghosts.
67. I've always believed that departed souls have better things to do with their time than to bug me.
68. Considering the sheer number of potential souls floating around the Earth, my chances of running into a ghost have to got to be far better than my chances of running into either an alien or a yeti.
69. I'll let you know how that works out the next time I write one of these lists.
70. Yeti is a funny word. Funny or not, I don't think I'd like to run into a 10ft wookie-ape-man in the Himalayas.
71. I doubt I'll ever find myself wandering about the Himalayas.
72. I used to have a desire to climb mountains.
73. The guy who cut his own arm off with a pocket knife killed that dream.
74. Had I been in his position, I would have stood there and cried until I died of exhaustion, hunger, and blood loss.
75. I think I'll just stick to the Mt Everest IMAX movie. (This "list" doesn't resemble a list of things about me anymore, does it?)
76. I took five years of piano lessons.
77. I can successfully play "Pop! Goes the Weasel" reading the music.
78. I can play much more difficult pieces when not reading the music.
79. I learned to play by ear, memorized the songs, and faked "reading the music". Once we started pieces that were four and five pages long, I gave up and told my teacher what I had been doing. She wasn't too pleased.
80. I sank a lot of my parents' money into lessons without accomplishing much.
81. I still feel bad about that.
82. But I'm very well-rounded.
83. I never played sports.
84. I was frequently picked last in gym class.
85. I'm not that uncoordinated- I think it had more to do with being the weird kid... and I didn't realize I needed glasses until the 8th grade.
86. I still hate volleyball.
87. And I'm still not a people-person.
88. Every now and then we did the limbo- I was always picked first for that!
89. I'm still quite the limbo champ. :)
90. Hmm... I took seven years of Spanish classes and still can't speak it. I'm beginning to see a pattern of incompetence.
91. I have unnatural dexterity in my toes. I'm quite good at picking things up and catching things.
92. I'm ambidextrous. I was left-handed, then in kindergarten the teacher only taught writing right-handed, so I switched. I still have full and equal use of both hands. (Neither of which is very good at playing the piano! :) )
93. I'm colorblind, which is quite rare for a woman. Fully defeating all genetic probability, both of my brothers have normal color vision.
94. I don't have exceptional hearing, but I must be really good at picking up the lower registers. I've always heard cars at the bottom of our driveway before anyone else( my driveway is exceptionally long, by the way). I used to freak my mom out when I was little by saying "Daddy's home!" and then he'd show up a few minutes later.
95. Either that, or I'm psychic and I only pick up on really stupid things. I have a talent for wasting talent.
96. My earliest memories are of jumping off my brothers' top bunk bed onto the spare bed on the other side of the room. A real leap of faith.
97. I also liked to sit in a crate on that bed, and jump up and down. (It was my boat!) Once I flew off the bed and crashed, taking a chunk out of the wall (and my head).
98. I respect and love my mother and father more than anyone. It took a lot of patience to raise me.
99. It's amazing that I'm still alive. It's more amazing that I did such stupid things without consequences.
100. That is the number one reason I believe in God. I don't think I could have made it this far on my own.

Disrespect For Daylight Savings

Along with every other reasonable person in the US, I HATE the whole daylight savings time thing. It's stupid and messes with my sleeping, which is always a big "no no". Yes, I know that this was the "good change" where I "gain" an hour, however, my dislike for the concept is too strong to actually enjoy my "extra" hour.

So in honor of my anti-DST stance (and the bad mood that comes with it), my mom and I skipped out on God today to go shopping in Charlevoix. First, we had lunch at a lakeside restaurant - I ordered a yummy Mandarin Macadamia salad (really good... except that red peppers and papaya really don't taste all that good together...) Then went through all the downtown shops. My big find of the day- an antique store/boutique that only sells European items. Nothing says "I hate DST" like some fine Irish linen! :) Ha. I ended up buying an embroidered journal (French) and my mom bought me an antique amethyst pendant for Christmas. I have no idea where I'll wear it, but it's gorgeous!!!!

Feeling just a twinge of buyer's remorse on the journal. I own about ten journals and I never write in any of them. I suppose I'm in love with the concept. Blank pages = endless opportunities. (But it's still really pretty!!!)

I'll have to go back there to pick up some presents for friends. I'll bet downtown is beautiful at Christmastime. And who doesn't need/want European Shea Butter?

Mmm. Now I'm sitting in front of Desmond with a great cup of coffee. (Did I ever mention that I decided to name him Desmond?) Guess I could get used to stupid ol' daylight savings.

Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own

I suck at blogging... or my life is too boring to fill more than one paragraph every two weeks. At any rate, I finally have something interesting to say.

Last Monday, Karen, Mike, Chris, and I went to the U2 concert at the Palace. I'm still reeling from the experience. For one thing, I left fully determined to save humankind. For another, they played "Miss Sarajevo", my favorite song- that was unexpected. It was never a "hit" and doesn't actually appear on any of the regular albums (besides the "Best of" 1990-2000 album). ...I completely lost it when Bono started to sing a NEW verse!! (I love it when he does that!) The whole thing was even better than I imagined it would be.

I also have to mention that the opening act was Gavin Rossdale's new band. Ha! I wasn't expecting to fulfill a pre-teen dream at this concert... (It's funny to think of Gavin as a "teen idol"... but he was the best we had in the mid-90s.) I suddenly want to wear flannel and avoid showering...

The strangest part of the whole experience is how much different I feel about a lot of things. I think the right thing came along at just the right time... and it has me thinking about everything. Or maybe it's just those female hormones talking.

The day after the concert, I was driving home from work, listening to "With or Without You", when I went past a small Catholic graveyard in the middle of nowhere. There was a teenage girl there, sitting cross-legged and facing a tiny grave. She was all bundled up, like she planned to be there for quite a while. I saw her from pretty far away- there's never anyone in that graveyard. As I drove closer, I noticed that she was obviously shaken... and her lips were moving. It broke my heart, and I can't get her out of my head.

Supercomputing

I'm back!!!

After nearly a month of broken computer-hood, I have finally found the funds and the time to build myself a new supercomputer. Yea.

I haven't named the new guy yet. All I know is that he's most definitely British. Since my last computer was named Harrison, I think it's only appropriate to name this one Ewan. (It just doesn't roll off the tongue quite as easily as Harrison...) I'm still tossing the name "Desmond" round too...

So little has happened in the last thirty days... actually, it's quite pathetic. My life since June has pretty much consisted of work and nothing else. I can't wait until the end of the year, when things quiet down after Christmas. Bleh.

It's Finally Over!

I have never been so happy to have a week past me in my entire life, finals weeks included. I worked about 70 hours this, had my car break, and finished it all off with a big emotional fiasco. Somehow, it all turned out ok.

In honor of that, I'm going to neglect my blog, pop in a chick flick, and eat some Superman ice cream.

You've Got to Be Kidding...It's Only Tuesday?

Even though I've already called/emailed many of my friends to tell them about my day, it was so insane, I really have to share it with the world.

I work at a photography studio- it's always a crazy place, especially this time of year, but today was... unusual.

1. Realtor comes in and has her picture taken. Most want to get their image on CD because they're going to email the picture to business card places anyway. This Realtor DOES NOT want a digital file, she wants a paper portrait. Later she calls me up and wants me to email her 4x5 to her... the paper 4x5. I can't believe she's that dumb, so I say, "Wait, do you want a digital file, a paper portrait or both?" She replies, "Yes, I want you to email me the paper portrait."

2. A mom comes in to order her son's senior pictures, furious about the quality of the proofs. (We print our proofs at a lower quality to discourage scanning and copying.) I explain this to her at great length, show her how beautiful the final portraits will look, but she still doesn't get it. So she does her order anyway, then points to a proof she has ordered from and shows me that it was accidentally scratched. She asks, "Will this show up in the portraits?" I ask, "The scratch on your proof??" She says (as if I were an idiot), "Yeah, the scratch."

3. A client calls me and asks if she can give me her order over the phone. She's already been in to see her proofs twice, so I tell her I'll do it only if she has a simple order with no special retouch requests, and will not be able to come to the studio anytime in the near future. She says her order is very simple and she won't be in town anytime soon. Thirty minutes later, as she's describing a TREE in the background that she wants me to change, I tell her that I'd feel better if she just came in to the studio. I ask when she'll be in town next. She says "Oh, I'm getting a pedicure at 11:00..... so how about tomorrow around 2:00?"

I think they were all flooded out of the bomb shelter they've been hiding in since the Cuban Missile Crisis.

Not Another RockStar Post!

Ha, yes, ANOTHER posting about Rock Star INXS!

The last few weeks, I've been faithfully watching the show (and by that, I mean obsessively) partially because I'm strangely attracted to Mr. Dave Navarro, and partly because I'm intrigued by this "MiG" character.

I've finally come to a startling conclusion.

"MiG" is in fact Darren Hayes, former Savage Garden frontman. Come on, how many Sydney-born Aussies with dark hair and the same jawline are out there? Really? Darren's ready to make his big comeback after his flop-pop album and the marvelous but underpublicized "The Tension and the Spark". It's a big conspiracy! ;)

Come on, look at the pictures and tell me they don't look a lot alike.


MiG


Darren

i-aleisha

I'm such a sucker for good marketing. I mentioned my new i-pod a few entries ago... I've been dancing ever since, imagining myself a silhouette person on a bright blue/green/orange/purple/red/yellow background. But I must confess... I already owned an MP3 player. It just didn't come recommended by flashy commercials. (This is all Bono's fault! It was that "Vertigo" commercial!!!)

Am I regressing to the high-school thought process? Have I been spending too much time on senior portraits?

Before you know it, I'm going to be spending $70.00 on a pair of jeans that's covered with holes...

Romeo and Juliet

Every single night, my cat sits and waits by our back porch... every single night, all night long. At first, I thought she was longing for the outdoors. Luckie is an indoor cat and hasn't stepped a paw outside since she was a kitten. Finally, a few weeks ago, I turned the spotlight on by the screen door, and there was a tomcat sitting on the other side of the screen! I've been watching for him now, and he comes to visit her every single night. They just sit by each other for hours, staring at each other. Sometimes they even touch noses through the screen! The last week, he's been coming to see her during the day too. It's kind of cute and sad at the same time...

Need You Tonight

Last fall, it was LOST.

This summer, it's Rock Star INXS.

Can you believe it? Me, watching (shudder) REALITY TV?

This is all Dave Navarro's fault. What is it exactly about him that is so... oddly pleasurable? I started watching out of morbid curiosity, now I'm an all out addict.

What has me so hooked? Is it Marty's quiet and kind off-stage persona? His "scary conductor"? Jordis' coif? JD's assiness? (Yes, "assiness" is the only way to describe him!) Suzie's ...er..uh... MiG's weird rock-star name? (What's with the capital "G" thing???) The fact that this is all rigged and he is obviously going to win? (I swear- it's all just a marketing ploy!)

Whatever it is, I'm hopelessly devoted to TV and am giving up on ever having a life of my own. So there it is.

All In A Tizzy

I never thought I would see the day when $2.99 for regular unleaded would make me rush to the gas station.

After the overnight jump from $2.70 to $3.50 last week, I began to suspect that driving would soon become a luxury of my past. Praise God, we were simply the victims of greedy investors in Detroit and a lot of price gouging. I learned this week that in Michigan, gas station owners are allowed to divide the cost of gas between their stations unevenly. Basically, that means charging lower prices downstate (with a small profit margin) to remain competitive and charging exorbitant prices upstate to make up the difference. As long as their average price does not fall into the category of "price gouging", they can't be prosecuted. That just isn't right. Luckily, a few of the lawmakers in Michigan who actually care about the ENTIRE state are working to end this practice. (As I point my finger angrily at our stupid governor, screaming, "This is all your fault!!!" Ha!) Just as quickly as it leapt nearly a dollar per gallon, so prices have dropped back down to something I can afford.

That means Karen can visit me and I'm going horseback riding this weekend!! Woo!
(I've never ridden a horse before... this should be interesting if nothing else...)

Who's Gonna Run Your Wild Horses

I love to buy running-gear. I have lots of running pants (the stretchy kind with the stripes up the side). I have lots of running shoes, all in a variety of purples. I especially love running-entertainment. Whenever I buy a new CD or mp3 player, it absolutely must have "anti-skip for running" features. It's quite the selling point for me. "I can use this for running? How wonderful! I'll take it!"

So here's the the thing. I've never gone running. Ever. Ok, ok, there was one time back in college, my ROTC roommate dragged me to an indoor track for company and I sat the bench after 1 lap.

I don't have any illusions about one day becoming a runner. I don't set my alarm for 6:00 every single morning (believing the night before that I will actually get up) and then decide to sleep in instead. I know that I'm a lazy person. I set my alarm for 8:30. So why can't I get this running-thing out of my head?

Just the other day, my brother gave me an ipod shuffle for my birthday, and the first thought to pop in my head when I opened it was, "Wow! This will be great for running!!"

?

Black Sabbath

Bon Jovi was fantastic... he mostly played older stuff. The whole thing was very 80's. It was cool though. Please tell me super-tight jeans and high waistbands are NOT coming back into style.

Tomorrow I'm headed down to Cedar Point. Haven't been there in a few years. Should be fun.

Oh yeah, and Saturday is my birthday. Ugh. I hate this "getting older" thing. At least I'll be too busy defying gravity on my stupid day to notice that I'm over the hill.

The media has convinced us all that we should have "accomplished" something by my age. Well, I haven't, and that depresses me.

Just imagine what I'll be like on my 30th birthday! ;)

Riveted

Yesterday, I made two life-altering discoveries.

The first is spray-on panyhose. I suffer from a condition that causes me to ruin every pair of panyhose I own the very first time I wear them. Sometimes I don't even get them on both legs before I put a hole in them. This leg-makeup really looks like the real thing and is so much easier in the morning than searching for a pair that, at the very least, has a hole in a place that won't show.

My second discovery is the show "Arrested Development". For some reason, I never watched it this season, most likely the result of a programming conflict. Last night, FOX was having a two-hour marathon. I didn't move the whole two hours. I seriously have not laughed that hard or that often at any TV show in recent memory. Between this show and LOST, I will be spending a lot of time in front of the TV this fall.

It's Official

The title says it all. I have firmly decided that I really don't want to be a graphic designer. The last two years have made me realize that I hate clients. I hate changing my vision to fit the whims of someone without any artistic talent. It feels a little too much like whoring my skills out.

SO... No more graphic design.

My decision will limit me even more when it comes to a real job search, but it's for the best. I'm specializing in digital artwork, manipulation, and reconstruction. I have more of an edge in that area, so when I finally find an employer hiring for that kind of work, there won't be as much competition.

The cool part of all this is that I get to deconstruct my current website and put something more fun up. Watch for big changes in the next few weeks!

Drink! Drink!

There are only three things you must understand about my day.

1. A few weeks ago, I bought Bon Jovi tickets.
2. It's 7:30 and I'm already tipsy
3. I forgot the last one.

Willy Wonka! Willy Wonka!

That two-second line from the opening song has been stuck in my head all evening and probably will be there for at least the rest of the week.

I went to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory today. I give it two thumbs way up. I seriously giggled through the whole thing. Especially at "the discovery of his first grey hair" and at the 2001 black obelisk spoof.

Just one concern. Is it weird that I still find transgendered-man-child Johnny Depp incredibly sexy?

It's probably my inner five year-old boy talking.

Well, at any rate, I'm feeling very inspired... along with a curious desire to wear purple velvet......

Worst Day of My Life To Date

The title explains it all. I always had this nasty suspicion that I would prematurely grey. Sometimes I would see really light hairs near the base of my scalp, and convince myself that they were actually blonde.

Today, just a little over a month shy of my 23rd birthday, I looked in the mirror at work and noticed my first real grey hair. No mistaking it - it's about six inches long. Long enough to tuck behind my ear, at least. I whimpered, called my mommy- no sympathy there, just laughter. Called Karen - no sympathy there either, more laughter. So I gave up on calling people and went to Burger King instead. When my friends and family can't comfort me, cheese always can.

I feel older tonight than I did this morning. It's all downhill from here.

Half-Blood Mania

Today I feel like the hugest geek in the world. Less than twenty-four hours following the release of the 6th Harry Potter installment, I turned the last page of the book. Let me make one thing very clear; I'm not a fanatic (ha, I save all my fanatic energy for Star Wars!) I just enjoy the series. I know that lots of adults read them. Nonetheless, I still feel a little dorky, so bear with me as I rationalize.

For one thing, I'm a very fast reader and the book isn't exactly heavy reading.

For another, it's entertaining. Ron and Hermione make me laugh. Rowling nails teenage melodrama.

Well, that's all the rationalization I've got in me. Nope, not much there. I like pre-teen literature and I'll just have to accept that. Watch out for my future blog entries on Judy Blume and Carolyn B Cooney.

ps. The end of the book had me in tears. Yes! Tears.

Pictures, Pictures, Pictures

I promised days ago, and now I'm finally going to deliver. Here are my fantastic Hawaii photos. (They weren't worth waiting for, were they?)

I'm Back!

I'm terribly jet-lagged and desperately wanting to forsake "reality" for paradise. But here I am anyway. Damn.



Awwh. Pretty plumerias. Hawaii is the only place on earth you can wear one behind your ear and not feel like an idiot. I will be posting a bunch of my photos tomorrow. I tried to do it tonight, and the internet connection to my computer said "no". So you have to wait a day.

Anywhoo, I had a really great time in Maui. I watched the sun rise from the top of a mountain, bathed in a waterfall-fed pool, went parasailing, went on a dinner cruise, spelunked through a lava tube, hiked through a bamboo forest, drove through a rain forest with 54 1-lane bridges, saw an active volcano, drank lots of pina coladas and lava flows, barely had any guys hit on me...

Who would have guessed the island is entirely populated with honeymooning couples this time of year? There's nothing like taking a vacation to get away from everything and then find yourself surrounded by couples at the very peak of their lifetime happiness. Ugh. You know, I'm ok with singlehood. I like freedom. Sunsets on the beach just aren't the same by yourself.

So I'm going to go catch up on my sleep now.

By the way, Karen, who is this "Squid" guy, who didn't have all their teeth, and who are you accidentally calling? I feel like I don't even know you!

I'm Too Sexy

Well, I made my modeling debut the other day. That was... interesting. Don't get me wrong, I had a great time. It's just that to make my dress lay the right way in front of the camera, I had to have it pulled way up in the back, with my butt sticking out. And I was right in front of the door. With lots of people walking by in the hallway. It wasn't that bad. I figured I can show my butt to lots of strangers if I get cool portraits out of the deal. :)

I may post one or two of the best ones in a few weeks.

Off the Beaten Path

I officially suck at blogging. It's one of those things I think about doing as my computer is shutting down and don't have the ambition to turn everything back on to do. Hmmm.

So the first few t-shirts are posted in my store at www.cafepress.com/knightees . Guess what everyone's getting for Christmas and birthday presents??!!! ;)

On a very happy note, yesterday I crossed another thing off my "Big List of Things to Do Before I Die". I took my mom to a day spa for her birthday and we got lovely pedicures and manicures. I'd never done the day spa thing before, so it was exciting. You have these strange moments where you suddenly realize that some woman you've never met before is rubbing your feet, then the next second, it feels so nice, you don't care. Kind of like those fleeting moments in the dentist office where you take a step back from the situation and say to yourself, "I'm letting a stranger scrape plaque off my teeth... there is something very weird about this...."

On an even happier note, I leave for Maui very soon. I'm trying to find cool things to do on the internet so I don't have to do any planning once I get there. I just booked a spelunking tour of an ancient lava tube! This next week is going to move very, very slowly...

KnightTees

Alright, the beginnings of KnightTees are up and running. So far I only have a couple of things online, so check back often for new products!

www.cafepress.com/knighttees

Check it out!

Aleisha Couture

I'm getting worse and worse about writing in my blog. I blame it on the beautiful weather we've been having. So I don't write, but my skin isn't pastey anymore. Give & take.

My big thing right now is packing for vacation. I leave in just two weeks. "Woo-Ha" for seven glorious days of hiking up volcanoes and drinking Mai Tais. I may never come home.

The week before, I get to play "model coordinator". I have a feeling that will mean I sit in the office and call people to remind them of where they need to go and what they need to wear the day before. I get to be a model myself on Tuesday, so it won't be all bad. Watch out Paris & Milan! At least I can dress down all week. It will prepare me for the laziness of vacation!

One more thing. (This entry is making me feel like I'm actually cool instead of the loser that I really am!) I get to go in for a spa manicure and pedicure next weekend. I've never had my nails done professionally, so I'm excited to try something new.

Oops. Another thing. Jamie has convinced me to start a t-shirt line. I will be posting the website as soon as it's ready. Before you know it, Paris Hilton will be wearing my tees and I'll be an overnight success. So you should all buy one as soon as I have them available so you don't have to pay hundreds of dollars for them later. :)

Dear Blog,

I haven't been maintaining my blog. I haven't been maintaining anything. I just want to sleep all day. I'm sensing the beginnings of one of those short-lived, unexplained depressions. I am, however, very stocked up with reading to last me through my blues. The other day, I went to a used book sale and bought 50 books for ten bucks! Many of them are antique editions of classics (you know, leather-bound with the gold foil) and the rest are contemporary books that I've always felt like I should read and never have. I started with Bridget Jones' Diary. This probably explains the depression...

On a side note (to all you other bloggers), have you ever noticed that the term "blog" is not in the blogger spell-check dictionary? Doesn't that seem odd? It bothers me. If anyone is going to recognize the term "blog" as a legitimate word, it should at least be blogger.com's own spellcheck.

Something To Be

I recently purchased Rob Thomas' "Something to Be". I am listening to it right now. Mr. Thomas never fails to "wow me" with his relavent lyrics and fun melodies. I personally like the title track, "When The Heartache Ends", and "Now Comes the Night" the best. I always suspected it, but he has proven himself to have been the driving force behind Matchbox 20. Congrats to Rob on a job very well done.

Ummm...?

I just sat here, staring at the screen for a full five minutes, without the slightest idea of what I should say. Even now, blank.

Well, I'm going to eat some ice cream instead. As soon as I think of something decent or interesting to say, I'll be back.

... ... ...

Hungry Like The Wolf

Today I decided to go to the McDonald's drive-thru. There aren't many lunch options on my side of town, so I frequent McDonald's, Burger King, Subway, and Quizno's. When you eat at the same places over and over again, you get to know the people who work lunch. Well, anyway, I'm at McDonald's and there's a new guy there. Well, he wasn't real swift, but I don't have high expectations for fast food employees. I ordered a two-cheeseburger meal, nothing big or messy. I open my bag, and there I find a GIGANTIC wad of napkins! I counted them. 14 napkins!!!! For ONE meal!!!! I thought it was kind of funny. Who knows.

One more thing. I really like Duran Duran's new CD. It's the kind of music that you dance like a kid to. You can't dance "cool" to Duran Duran. It's all about hopping and flailing your arms about. The funny thing is, this WAS my "cool" dancing the first time around in 1980-whatever.

Empty Spaces Fill Me Up With Holes

All my former enthusiasm for blogging is fizzling out. It's not that I don't like sharing. I'm running out of material, that's all. I guess I'm going through one of those "quiet times" in my life.

Today was more exciting than usual. Karen surprised me with an unexpected visit. We got a McFlurry and went parking. Hot. ;) Ha. We actually did sit at the duck pond and cry on each other's shoulders for a good long time though. Now that I don't have any roommates, it's nice to sit and talk about boys with someone every once in a while.

I also bought a Darth Vader mask with a voice changer and cool breathing sounds for my niece. She loves all of her lightsabers and always gets excited when she sees the Episode III teasers. The mask was too scary in person. She started crying and made me put it away. Oh well.

Final random thought : I was thinking about the last minute I spent as a teenager and the first minute I spent being 20, flying through the parking lot of Meijer in a cart. Thank you, Carney. I will never forget it. :)

Help! I'm LOST!

Ooh, tonight's LOST was a good one. What am I saying? Every LOST is a good LOST. I really hope Shannon is the next to ...ahem... "leave the show". I really don't like that character. Sayid is WAY too good for her. And I'm really starting to love Sawyer. He's too funny.

So what kinds of scarey things are lurking behind the hatch? Walt is a bit like the kid from "The Ring", isn't he. I know we won't find out for weeks... perhaps months... who knows, it could be years. And I'll wait impatiently.

I hope there aren't aliens under the hatch. I don't like aliens. I mean, I like alien shows. I'm a complete X-Files junkie. But the "grey" style freak me out a little. I think it's the tiny mouth and the long fingers. Icky.

Ugh. I can't take too many seasons of this!

Doggy Style

Got your attention, didn't I? Sorry, I hate to disappoint, but I'm going to.

(Randomly - I love the Google "special logos" they're fantastic.)

I'm in a surprisingly good mood considering my commute was an extra HOUR long (thank you, construction) and then a little white toy poodle ambushed my car as I drove up my driveway. (Um... my driveway is REALLY long.) He leapt in front of me and started circling around the car, really close so I couldn't see where he was. I couldn't hit the stupid little doggy. I ended up getting out of my car, and he crawled inside when I opened the door. I dragged him out and pushed him towards his house. Then I ran for my car and just started driving. He followed me up to my door. Stupid dog.

I was also feeling particularly flirty today. That's dangerous. I'm turning into Karen! Before you know it, I'll have FOUR guys fighting over me! I'll take the British Australian ;) (ha ha! Just kidding, Karibou!)

Best & Worst

Today was all about extremities. On the one hand, I am discovering that the not being able to breathe part of being sick was not so bad. I guess imagined all the goop in my lungs magically disappearing. I was very wrong. This is very disgusting.

On the other hand, today happened to be my favorite day of the entire year: Girlscout cookie delivery day. I suppose as a young professional woman, I should be against girls in silly outfits selling cookies. I'm perpetuating a stereotype or something. But they're so darn yummy. Mmmmm.... Samoas. I really do love the crispy cocoanut, the gooey caramel, the crunchy cookie, the waxy chocolate.... It's a good thing they don't sell these year round.

Recovery

"Yea" for antibiotics. I'm one of those people who likes to deny that I'm sick. This time I gave up and went to the doctor and I'm very glad I did. No more bronchitis for Aleisha.

On that note, I'd like to mention that while I was laid up, I started reading "Tales From the 1001 Nights" for fun. I think "The Princess Bride" has convinced me that I need an adventure book to read whenever I'm sick. Anywhoo, I get to this story called "The Historic Fart". I giggled a little. Deep down, I'm a 5 year old boy. The adult part of me assumed that "fart" was probably something different in this context. Well, it wasn't. It was a story about a fart so huge that it was remembered for years. These stories are ancient and they almost all take place in Baghdad. I think it should be safe to say that the US and Iraq have more in common than we'd like to admit. Can't you imagine a bunch Al Queda sitting around, laughing at each other's farts? All boys are the same.

Pretty In Pink

Call me shallow, but sometimes, things make me very happy. I don't need stuff to feel good, but I sure do love that feeling of satisfaction when I find something GREAT at a GREAT price. I'm a happy lioness feelin' pretty damn good about a pretty pink coat. It looks a lot like this one http://www.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=144302&CategoryID=15080. It was originally $140, and I got it for 50 bucks! "Woo" for me. Now I just need some pointy shoes, a big white tote bag, and a job to wear it to. My current job is more "Gap" and this jacket calls for a "Banana Republic" sort of job. Time to hit Monster! I apologize if I'm making anyone nauseous... It's just so pretty! :)

Calling All Musicians!

Instead of a usual Blog entry, today this is a "wanted ad". I'm bored. You are all very aware of this. I've been complaining about my boredom for the last few weeks, and I've decided to do something about it. I need a design project. I'm specifically looking for a band/singer who is serious about marketing their music and looking for an album cover/website/posters/whatever. I am willing to do the first project free of charge (anything after that, we'll play by ear). With this cruddy economy, I can't get any interviews without 3 yrs experience. I'm putting in my three years... but I'm not doing much designing. I realized yesterday that my last large project was almost a year ago. This three-year hiatus also isn't doing much for my portfolio. I want a project that is "artistic" by nature and I want to work with someone who will give me plenty of freedom. I'm not set on working with a band. It just sounded fun. So, anyone interested at all, please contact me at postmaster@aleishaknight.com or leave a comment on this post. To view my online portfolio, go to http://aleishaknight.com/graphicdesign.html. I only ask that if you request my services, you intend on actually using what I create. (I don't want to make a poster for your imaginary band.) Thanks!

The Sun's Shine-Shinen'

Around 1:00 today, I finished up some work on our model search, went to my car, put the windows down, put the shades on, cranked the radio (Kid Rock's "Cowboy" was playing), laid some rubber and lifted some dust, and passed 2 Humvees and a Viper on my way to the McDonald's two miles from work. This is not the town I grew up in anymore.

But it's April and 70-some degrees. Nothing can bring me down.

Luckie

This is my stupid cat and this is where she sits all day, toasting in the window. (This picture is from about a month ago- note the SNOW in the reflection!!!)

I'm So Tired, But I Can't Sleep

I couldn't sleep last night. I know that I saw 4:30 at least. And when I finally did go out, I had a weird dream about shopping at Ikea with Matt from "the Clique" and his non-existent identical twin brother. They left me there. Matt, why did you and your twin brother ditch me at Ikea???

At least this was a relatively normal dream. More often than not, I'm being chased by zombies or cannibal pygmies. Someone or something is always trying to eat me in my dreams. Strange, huh?

On to happier things. I may be doing a touch of modeling for a photographers' workshop thing this summer. The instructors for my class are the Simones, world famous photographers who charge thousands of dollars for a session. (Here are some examples http://www.simoneportrait.com/photo-index.html ) I'm very excited. The images will be gorgeous and I get a CD to keep. I just hope it all works out and I'm not having a bad hair day or something.

La la...la la... In-Com-Plete!

Maybe I'd been trapped indoors for too long. Maybe I'd been scraping ice off of my car for too many days. Whatever it was, I have never been so relieved to have nice weather in my entire life.

I spent the ENTIRE day outside rollerblading, running around, and sitting on the porch while my poor cat stared out the window at me. She had her little nosed pressed up against the glass, and actually made me feel sorry for her for a bit.

Wait, before all cat lovers all over the world start sending me angry emails, let me just say that I love cats. I'm totally a cat person, and I adore my baby as much as I possibly can. She just isn't very affectionate, so it's hard for me to really connect to her. That and she's such an idiot.

One more thing. Please forgive me, but I really do like the new BSB song, "Incomplete". I heard it for the first time today- it's almost all AJ singing with a symphonic background. (Oh please, I was in high school during the summer of "I Want it That Way", I'm allowed to know their names.) Anywhoo, the song is quite beautiful and I've been humming it all day. I'm officially 40. Bring it on.

Meow.

Well, I've had a busy week, and learned some very important lessons.

First, apparently, an interstate can be physically one road, suddenly become "two" roads in one and therefore have its mile markers and exits start with different numbers. Thank you I-69-96. (Jamie is LAUGHING!!!)

Second, no matter how bad your day was, bagel pizzas, alcohol, ice cream, and a best friend you haven't seen in months will make it all better. (This is feeling a little like a credit card commercial... bagel pizzas... $2.00 ... Ben & Jerry's Caramel Sutra... $4.00 ... Giant bottle of Arbor Mist... $7.00 ... Girls' Night In... Priceless!)

Finally, cars are not sound-proof. I know they seem that way when you're parked somewhere, but sometimes people can hear your conversations. And poor Karen had a middle-aged dad asking for her number all because I opened my big mouth when his Abercrombie& Fitch-good-looking son walked by. Wow. He was hot. ;)

Alright kids, the night is young, I have a big pile of movies to watch (I've already gone through "Ocean's 12" - fun, but not as good as the first, "Flight of the Phoenix" - awful, but the whiney-aeronautical-engineer-Nazi guy is intriguing, and "Maverick" - it always makes me smile.) Next up, "Batman Returns". Love that Tim Burton. Love that Christopher Walken. Love that Catwoman suit.

Mmmm Mmmm Good

I have been spending entirely too much time on the internet the last week or so. For one thing, I'd like to know why people choose to use "Japanimation" characters in places where their picture should go. Maybe I have an overgrown ego, but I'm proud of my identity, and I'd rather not hide behind a cartoon. I suppose it's less "anonymous", but they could at least choose other kinds of artwork. I'm a giant RPG fan and I love the style in that context, but does every cartoon-representation have to have blue spiky hair?

I've also realized that I'm one poor, unusual soul wandering the universe. Sometimes I wake up with a great desire to don my pretty khakis and scamper the streets of NYC, singing a chorus of "I Enjoy Being a Girl". Sometimes I wake up and want to stay at home, playing KOTOR as my Jedi alter-ego, Liah Averrod. Other days I want to paint, and then watch a "film". I've always realized that I have a unique combination of interests, but I seriously can't find many people that I have much in common with! I'm becoming a very lonely, schitzophrenic stew of stereotypes.

Nothing Much

I've been taking long walks in the woods the last week or so, enjoying the beautiful weather and trying to get a bit of exercise before the weeds come out. I was doing the same today, and I took my camera along to use up all of my old black& white film. I was looking through the viewfinder and very nearly stepped on a big, icky snake that was crawling along very slowly. Of course, I started screaming "Oh my God! Eeeeeh! Oh my God!" and running away like a big idiot. Guess that's the end of my walks. It's back to pilates.

Ugh... the weekend isn't long enough. I have to go to a program/ conference thing in Lansing this Tuesday, and I'm positively dreading it. But I get to see Karen at any rate. Yea!

Irreverent Comments

First, spare me one old-lady moment. I'm looking out my back patio and the sun is just below the horizon, illuminating the sky in blues, purples, reds and pinks. Every now and then, I am reminded of how lucky I am to have a 180 degree view that extends all the way to the horizon, with no trace of human life. Gorgeous.

Ok, time for the irreverent comment I promised you. The Pope used to be hot. The news keeps showing pictures of him when he was young, and I would have hit on him if I had been a member of his parish in 1940-whatever.

That brings me to my next thought- I have been doing some research on my family tree recently and have discovered that I'm mostly German and Polish, with a dash of Hungarian (this explains the nose....) and the great-great-granddaughter of some impoverished indentured servants. My families came to the US in the late 1870's to avoid starvation. This totally kills all of those "Princess Diary" daydreams I had when I was about 12. What a bummer.

Does Your Truck Offer the Most Torque of Any Gas HD Pickup?

I'd like to take this moment to express my pathetic devotion to the TV sensation that is "Lost". Yes, I tune in every week, looking for those "hidden clues". I actually know all of the character's names, including the dog. And of course, I have plenty of running theories on the "mystery" behind the island. At first I thought they were dead, then I thought they were in the Bermuda Triangle. My current favorite is that they all moved through some sort of hyper-dimensional wormhole and are now in an alternate universe. No matter how you slice it, I'm far too into this show for a first season. My Wednesday nights are officially filled for the next three to five years.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...
I tried the Tropicana(?) Fruit Smoothie for the first time today and was very disturbed. Somehow, drinking yougurt mixed with juice is NOT appealing. It tasted fine, but I just couldn't get past the drinking-yogurt thing. Save yourself the effort. On a similar note, the new "Smoothie Mix" Skittles get a big thumbs-up.

One last thing. I'm turni (AHHHHHH- my alarm clock just started blasting Marvin Gaye at me out of nowhere!!!) ...ahem. I'm turning into an incarnation of Jane Austen's "Emma". I started plotting yesterday to take this sweet, naieve girl under my misguided wing and do a little match-making. God help us all.

White Padded Room

It's a Monday night, I'm listening to some "Hey Jude", and I'm so exhausted I'm about to fall over face first into my open bag of Smoothie Mix Skittles.

Again, I'm placing the blame on DST. Of course, to make matters worse, I came across an old day planner from college last night, and had a minor quarter-life crisis that spanned from feeling like I've sold-out and given up, to a flare up from my ticking biological clock. The underlying life-issues that I don't have time to think about during the day always catch up to me the second I turn the light off. Why do I suddenly start worrying about becoming a pathetic old spinster woman at 2am, when all I really want to do is sleep? Why does that progress into an in-depth analysis of my entire personality? -Is there something wrong with me? Why do I push everyone away?- Before I know it, I'm trying to quantify every aspect of my life. The problem is, I can't step outside of myself and look at my life from an objective perspective. How many people really can? It's a vicious cycle, one-hundred percent in my control, one-hundred percent my fault, and yet I always find a way to blame it all on God instead.

Salvete!

Let me just start by saying how much I despise Daylight Savings Time. It's completely ridiculus, and I'm greatly opposed to anything that disturbs my sleep schedule. So there it is.

In addition to the whole "lost hour" thing, I slept in unusually late, so I'm feeling a bit off balance. You may notice that as you read this.

Anywhoo, I got up and started my journey into the Latin language. All those years of Spanish (and Karen's French!) are finally proving useful. I'm finding my first few lessons much less daunting than I expected. Maybe someday I'll find a good use for this language too.

Today has been pretty quiet otherwise. I went on a long walk- it is beautiful outside, the snow is finally melting, and my legs could use some toning. I also spent lots of time online today... only to find that I can't "Google" my name anymore. Some stupid little girl actress also named "Aleisha" has taken all the good spots on the search engines. Damn that "Are We There Yet"! So I'm determined to destroy her career one way or another and reclaim my spot. Anyone have any ideas?

Si vales, valeo!

It's a Beautiful Day

To my amazement, today wasn't so bad. I spent most of the day with my niece, running around outside, playing "airplane" and blowing bubbles. When I wasn't looking, she stopped being a toddler and turned into a little girl.

I also spent some time working on my website. It needed to be reworked and "prettied up". I haven't posted any changes yet - I plan on doing some more work tomorrow and posting it all at once. As a graphic designer, I can't help but feel very embarrassed of my current website. It really sucks. Of course, after designing and retouching all day, working on my own things never sounds appealing.

One last thing. Today I decided to learn Latin. Anyone who knows me is probably aware of my obsession with Roman history, so it isn't that shocking. I've always been interested and always have had a certain aptitude for it. This evening I finally went to Borders and got myself a grammar book, a dictionary, and a Caramocha. Ok, and one of those cool blue travel mugs. I justified the purchase by saying it was all in honor of the pope. I realize I'm not Catholic, but you can't just tell someone you've randomly decided to learn a dead language without throwing a tiny bit of a not-funny joke in there. Someone might think I'm weird. :)

More Monotony

Ugh. I'm so tired, I alliterated my title. But considering I'm new to this whole "blogging" thing and it still hasn't lost it's charm, here I am typing anyway.

So my day was as boring as usual. I went to work, made people look better, questioned my life choices while waiting on hold... I spent a half an hour of my life removing scabs from the lips of some old man's portrait. Besides feeling somewhat sick to my stomach, I couldn't help but ask myself, "What the hell am I doing?". All I ever really wanted to do was make nice logos and brochures.

On a positive note, I did a little shopping after work. I'm desperately trying to restrain myself from doing too much vacation shopping (I don't leave for Maui until the end of June!!!) but I just can't help it. One can never truly have too many pairs of flip-flops and tank-tops.

Well, that's about it. I am planning on doing a little spring cleaning on the ol' web site tomorrow, so watch for big changes at aleishaknight.com.

Photography 101

Well, I'm about an hour into blogging, and decided that it was time to grace the internet with yet another portrait of myself. :) This is a photo taken for a photography class back in college. Loved those "self-portrait" assignments... My friends have kindly dubbed it my "CK ad".

Chapter One

Yea! It's my very first Blog entry. I was feeling a little left out, and finally decided to jump on the blog-bandwagon. I don't really have much of anything to say, but I imagine no one else writes anything of worth in these things anyway.

So...um. Today I tackled an ancient laptop with driver issues, saved another ancient computer from a severe printer malady, was called "sweetheart" by a gas-station clerck, ate a hot-fudge sundae for luch, (spilled some hot fudge on my jacket...), called a friend's answering machine just to say "hi", and watched "Finding Neverland". Again. God, my life is boring.