White Padded Room

It's a Monday night, I'm listening to some "Hey Jude", and I'm so exhausted I'm about to fall over face first into my open bag of Smoothie Mix Skittles.

Again, I'm placing the blame on DST. Of course, to make matters worse, I came across an old day planner from college last night, and had a minor quarter-life crisis that spanned from feeling like I've sold-out and given up, to a flare up from my ticking biological clock. The underlying life-issues that I don't have time to think about during the day always catch up to me the second I turn the light off. Why do I suddenly start worrying about becoming a pathetic old spinster woman at 2am, when all I really want to do is sleep? Why does that progress into an in-depth analysis of my entire personality? -Is there something wrong with me? Why do I push everyone away?- Before I know it, I'm trying to quantify every aspect of my life. The problem is, I can't step outside of myself and look at my life from an objective perspective. How many people really can? It's a vicious cycle, one-hundred percent in my control, one-hundred percent my fault, and yet I always find a way to blame it all on God instead.