Where Are You Christmas?

I think I'm in a funk.

Normally I'm the ultimate Christmas elf, bubbling over with "Peace on Earth" and decking the halls by mid-October. But not this year. I'm stuck somewhere back in September, just after "back to school" and before Halloween. I've been out Christmas shopping, trying to "beat the rush" but even that isn't doing it for me. Am I depressed? I don't feel depressed. Am I losing the Christmas spirit? Will I still be able to hear the bell ring this year?

I have a disoriented feeling - like when you take a nap, wake up a few hours later and think it's the next morning. Except I missed a month or two in there somewhere. November is almost half-over and I'm feeling very unprepared. Thanksgiving can't possibly be so close.

Maybe I was abducted by aliens, and they adjusted my memory. That would explain the new bar-code tattoo on the back of my neck.